Archive for the ‘Independence and Freedom’ Category

Do Something!

Apr 13th, 09 / 0 Comments

Sometimes, people just aren’t happy with where they are in life. This is more common for some people than others. When you’re unhappy with a situation, what do you do? Many people just find themselves talking about it and not doing anything to fix it. I know I’ve caught myself falling into this trap fairly often, though I’ve been getting better about it recently.

Now, I’m not saying talking about it isn’t a valid strategy to deal with a problem in the beginning. It’s good to get advice and see what other people think. But if you just complain about how things are, and you don’t do anything to change it, then what makes you think anything will change? If you don’t do anything, there’s no reason to expect anything will turn out differently.

Don’t like being around the house so often? Go outside. Call your friends and organize a gathering. Don’t have enough friends? Go meet new people… or at least get out of the house so someone new might have a chance of meeting you. Unhappy with your job? Look for a new one. Want to get fit? Eat better, exercise, or do both.

Obviously, some problems will be easier to fix than others. Finding a job in this economy is like finding fire at the north pole. Making friends is a bit easier, but someone who has a hard time with social issues may still find it difficult, and will have to put more effort into it than the natural party guy everyone likes. Just because a problem is hard doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try though. If you don’t try, nothing will change. If you do try, it’s still possible nothing will change, but it’s also possible you’ll find what you need to make the changes you want. Even if you only get one change out of a few you want, you’ll be doing better than you were before. And as you try more things, you have a better chance of finding another solution and getting closer to where you want to be. The absolute worst thing you can do is sit around and do nothing.

Naturally, you can break things down if you need to. If you’re looking for a job, then start with writing a resume, or  finding a few open jobs you’d like to apply to. Another day, write  a cover letter.  Still another day, gather references. And so on until you have everything you need. Then send in your application. If you’re looking to make friends, maybe the first step is just leaving the house. Don’t worry about anything else, just get outside your lair. Later, you might try approaching someone just to talk. If talking to someone you’ve never met is too much social pressure for you, go someplace with familiar people. If you’re a gamer like me, go to a gaming shop where they allow people to hang out and play. If you like writing, find a writer’s gathering in town where people share their writing. If you find people like you, and everyone knows you’re like them due to having your shared interest, it’s likely someone will approach you to talk.

In any case, it’s ok to do things in small chunks. Sometimes it’s the only way to keep them manageable. But start doing something. Even if you only spend 5-10 minutes at first, it will start you on the path to making a change. And that’s what this is all about. Unless you want things to stay the same of course. But if that’s the case, you had no reason to complain in the first place.

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Human Automation

Apr 11th, 09 / 0 Comments

I was musing to myself at work a few days ago. I realized that much of the time I’m working, the job I do requires absolutely no thinking. When it gets busy, I need to think how to prioritize tasks, but that’s it. Aside from that bit of thinking, the work I do most days can all be done on autopilot.

Now, certainly, this leaves lots of time for thinking, which is useful to have. I don’t seem to have enough of that these days. But then again, it also gives me the feeling of being a human cog in a machine to get a job done. I’ve felt this way about having a job for a long time, though I’m attempting to find a way of dealing with that problem. One way I’m doing this is to find a new job that feels a bit more meaningful. The other is by working on my websites, attempting to build them up to the point that I don’t need a job in the first place. I love writing, and fiddling with technical stuff, so it’s lots of fun to do this.

That’s a little off topic though. The point is, this feeling about being a cog in a machine is a fairly common feeling among the employed, though it’s by no means universal. Some people have their dream jobs, and they’ll never have cause to feel this way. Some people are being cogs, and just haven’t woken up to that yet. And some are in my position, aware, but not sure how to fix it, other than look for a new way that will help meet their needs. How did we get to this point though?

The truth is, we’ve always needed to do some work. Everything living needs to do some work in order to live. We need food and shelter from the elements simply to survive, so the work to obtain that is the minimum needed. Procreation also requires work (though we can probably classify some aspects of that as fun), and that is also required if we’ll live on as a species. Beyond that, we don’t need anything else.

These days, we do a lot more work, because we look to have a lot more stuff. Some of this stuff is really cool, and serves a useful or entertaining pupose. Some of it is neither cool, useful, or entertaining. We need to manufacture it somehow, and while machines can do some of that work, people need to do the rest. This means we need fewer people to provide all the food, so other people can provide all the toys. This makes more work for everyone, since we provide for ourselves and a bunch of other people. Someday, perhaps machinery will take over doing any work necessary for our survival, but that may come with it’s own problems, such as deciding on distribution of goods, and how to deal with the machinery breaking down.

Either way, we need a way to break free of the machine, and that’s where finding a job you love or getting your own business started comes in. It’s not foolproof, and obviously I’m still working on getting any one of those to work out for me. You can also look for ways to live minimally in order to work less as well, leaving you with more time to pursue living life.

It feels absolutely crazy to spend so much of life just working, and not living. We go to school for six hours a day for 13 years, do at least an hour a night of homework for four of them, then work eight hours a day for another 45 years. Some tack on four or  more extra years of schooling to that as well. Where does it end? When do we get to live? Do we not get to enjoy our youth without worrying about how to pay the bills?

I’m not taking that path. I know it’s possible to do otherwise, and I’m going to do everyhing I can to work less and play more while meeting my needs and those of any family I may need to support along the way. I haven’t found the solution that works for me yet, but I’ll get there. Perhaps this very site will be it, perhaps it won’t. I don’t know yet. But I’m not doing a 40, 50, 60 hour workweek for the next 40 years, unless I find something I can really enjoy for that time, and that allows good vacation time.

The one thing I’ve learned is there are a lot of strategies out there, and some work for some people better than for others. You really do need find your own way if you want it to work. That doesn’t mean there won’t be useful tools and learning experiences to be gained from others. For instance, the blogging software I use is created and maintained by WordPress, and the inspiration to try blogging came from 10 Reasons You Should Never Get a Job. But I’m finding out how to make this all work for me, and I may come to find out I need another strategy if this doesn’t work out in the end. My original site, Gaming My Way, was my first foray into blogging, and also a manifestation of my childhood dream to work with video games in some way. It’s been going for a year now, and I still work on it sometimes, but I’m also still experimenting with other ideas for now.

In any case, I’m not going to be a robot at my job forever. I will move on, and I will find the time to live my life, and not just work it all away.

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The Importance of Money

Apr 7th, 09 / 0 Comments

Lots of self-help people like to say that money isn’t everything, or money isn’t important. I can certainly see the point they’re making, and I’ll certainly agree that money isn’t everything. However, I will argue that money is important, and while it won’t guarantee anything, it will help a lot when it comes to happiness too.

The thing to remember is that, like many things, money is a tool, and how you use it will determine a lot. While money itself won’t make you happy, here are some things it will help provide that may help on the way to being happy: personal freedom, comfortable living, independence, and the ability to go out and do fun activities. Certainly, you don’t need money for any of these things, but it will make them all a lot easier to come by, as well as give you more options.

Of course, your goals will determine a lot, and you still need to have the right mindset. Sacrificing your life to earning money won’t make you any happier than you would be without the money, and might even make you worse off. But with the right balance between earning and enjoying yourself, it can be beneficial to getting the most out of life, and I think it’s positively silly when self-help people admonish us not to worry about the money.

Definitely think about other things, and certainly think about what you would do if you didn’t need to worry about money. Certainly even go ahead and do whatever you can of those things you would do without worrying about money. I completely agree with this part of the message. But saying it’s not important at all is ignoring the society we live in. Unless you can independently provide yourself with food, shelter, and the kind of entertainment you enjoy, you will need money at some point, and thinking about how to get it isn’t a bad thing. Obsessing over it might be harmful, such as looking to amass more and more money without understanding why you want it.

I’m currently in a low money situation, but I’m happy because I have enough to meet my needs, I have my friends, and I have my hobbies.

I also know I still want to earn more money, because it will be a way for me to improve my situation and that of those around me. I’m working on that part. Here are some reasons why having more money would be helpful:

-I could live on my own.
-I could help out friends who are having difficulty meeting their needs more often.
-I could afford some luxuries that I would enjoy, most specifically a Wii and a few games. This would also let me practice Super Smash Bros. Brawl more often and give me a chance to compete in any local tournament that comes up with a chance of winning.
-I wouldn’t have to watch my money when I want to go out with friends, and could just enjoy the night without thinking about every dollar I spend.

Now, none of these are necessary for my happiness. As I said, I’m quite happy as things are now. However, being able to do those things I listed would improve the quality of my life. In particular, living on my own would allow me to have guests whenever I wished, which makes it easier to have social gatherings, something I particularly enjoy. Once I’ve figured out a good way to earn money for myself, I can also help my friends do the same as well, and help get them to the point where they can meet all their needs.

The point is, I know what the money will actually do for me. It would provide me with more independence, a few luxuries I would like, the ability to help out more often, and fewer things to worry about. So I’m not just mindlessly seeking it, and I think that’s the trick. You need to know what money can do for you, and what you need to do for yourself in other ways. Money won’t give you confidence or self-esteem, at least not beyond a certain level. It won’t provide you with true friends, though it might give you the time and freedom to pursue more friendships.

Now, obviously, having money doesn’t ensure happiness, and lack of money doesn’t insure a lack of happiness. But I’m willing to bet that meeting your needs and living comfortably and independently is a good first step for anyone.

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