Sometimes, people just aren’t happy with where they are in life. This is more common for some people than others. When you’re unhappy with a situation, what do you do? Many people just find themselves talking about it and not doing anything to fix it. I know I’ve caught myself falling into this trap fairly often, though I’ve been getting better about it recently.
Now, I’m not saying talking about it isn’t a valid strategy to deal with a problem in the beginning. It’s good to get advice and see what other people think. But if you just complain about how things are, and you don’t do anything to change it, then what makes you think anything will change? If you don’t do anything, there’s no reason to expect anything will turn out differently.
Don’t like being around the house so often? Go outside. Call your friends and organize a gathering. Don’t have enough friends? Go meet new people… or at least get out of the house so someone new might have a chance of meeting you. Unhappy with your job? Look for a new one. Want to get fit? Eat better, exercise, or do both.
Obviously, some problems will be easier to fix than others. Finding a job in this economy is like finding fire at the north pole. Making friends is a bit easier, but someone who has a hard time with social issues may still find it difficult, and will have to put more effort into it than the natural party guy everyone likes. Just because a problem is hard doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try though. If you don’t try, nothing will change. If you do try, it’s still possible nothing will change, but it’s also possible you’ll find what you need to make the changes you want. Even if you only get one change out of a few you want, you’ll be doing better than you were before. And as you try more things, you have a better chance of finding another solution and getting closer to where you want to be. The absolute worst thing you can do is sit around and do nothing.
Naturally, you can break things down if you need to. If you’re looking for a job, then start with writing a resume, or finding a few open jobs you’d like to apply to. Another day, write a cover letter. Still another day, gather references. And so on until you have everything you need. Then send in your application. If you’re looking to make friends, maybe the first step is just leaving the house. Don’t worry about anything else, just get outside your lair. Later, you might try approaching someone just to talk. If talking to someone you’ve never met is too much social pressure for you, go someplace with familiar people. If you’re a gamer like me, go to a gaming shop where they allow people to hang out and play. If you like writing, find a writer’s gathering in town where people share their writing. If you find people like you, and everyone knows you’re like them due to having your shared interest, it’s likely someone will approach you to talk.
In any case, it’s ok to do things in small chunks. Sometimes it’s the only way to keep them manageable. But start doing something. Even if you only spend 5-10 minutes at first, it will start you on the path to making a change. And that’s what this is all about. Unless you want things to stay the same of course. But if that’s the case, you had no reason to complain in the first place.
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